Monday 1 October 2012

What if it All Came Crashing Down?

I keep envisioning this image of myself as a juggler, trying to simultaneously spin multiple plates on his hands, feet, elbows, knees, hips, head, and any other body part one could possibly balance a plate. I've been spinning them pretty darn well for a long time, balancing a child with diabetes, a struggling and rebellious teenager, a stubbornly demanding nine year old, three jobs - one of which is on call and very unpredictable, a range of familial problems, a husband who has changed jobs four times in sixteen months, financial struggles, my own personal health and exercise goals, and a marriage that has been suffering as a result of me being on overload for too long. It's been a precarious experience and I've been feeling like if I took a moment to breathe, all of the plates wold come crashing down. And broken plates is simply not an option.

So I checked out. On blogging, on life, and on myself. I've stretched myself too thin for too long, so I forced myself to step back and really evaluate my life. I asked questions, about what I want, what's important to me, and what things are not worth my time. Where do I want to be in six months, in a year, in five years? What do I truly want for my family, and for myself? Asking questions like these can be hard, because the answers are not always what we want to hear. But if I'm to get to where I want to be, I need to make some sacrifices, and focus on the things that will help me achieve my goals.

So more negativity. No more living in the past. No more worrying about, or even thinking about, trivial things. It's time to focus on what matters. On the positive, on the meaningful, and on making the most of each and every day.

1 comment:

  1. Hey Jen, what a ride. Praying that things settle down for you and your family.

    I have a rule about blogging. It should never, ever be another source of stress in your life. Write when you have something to say, when you feel like saying it, and when you have time to say it. If those stars don't align, don't worry about it!

    Hang in there - you got this!